Lately I have been inundated with babies. Wes’ coworker was the first, with a boy last August. After that Wes’ sister’s baby in October. This March a friend from Palo Alto had his first child and today our neighbors brought their daughters home from the hospital.
Babies, they are everywhere. And they are all so adorable. I want to hold them and love them and cuddle them.
But, I also want to give them back. Not just when they cry or they poop themselves, but when my arms get tired or my attention moves to something else.
Yes, I love little babies (hello – I love mini things, how could I not love a little baby?), but I’m not even close to being ready for them.
Growing up is something that freaks me out and, more often than not, I have to stop myself from saying (to myself) “I’m to young for…” insert whatever adult activity you can think of. Sure there are plenty of reasons why I’m not ready to have kids, but being too young to think about that point of my life is not one of them.
When people ask if Wes when we’re getting married my first reaction is to say, “Oh, woah, easy. We’re way too young for that.” When, in actuality, we’re not all. It’s just that I still picture myself as early 20s (as in 22) instead of late 20s (dear god, I’m going to be 30 in 3 years). Marriage? Babies? I think to myself. I can barely get myself out of bed most mornings and I still need someone to make my lunch so can get those oh so crucial extra 10 minutes of sleep. You can see how I might think that I’m still early 20s.
On the plus side, it seems like there are babies everywhere I plan to travel in the next 8 months. Babies to cuddle and swoon over. Most of all, babies to buy adorably cute baby shoes for. Someday I’ll come to terms with my age and settle down and think about kids. But for right now I’m happy with my life of bad crime drama (today alone: Law & Order: SVU, Charmed, Bones and now Law & Order), glasses of wine in the middle of the afternoon, spiral mac for dinner and sleeping late (not to mention through the night) on the weekend.
Someday, possibly, kids. For right now, though, I’m enjoying being young and free.