My Friend List

I admit, I got sucked in by Facebook.  Look at all these old friends I thought to myself as I added friend after friend after friend.  And by friend, I mean “friend” because, let’s face it, we’re nto friends.  And having these people on my friend list does not make it so.  Sure we were close once, but good lord how many years have gone by without a word from either end.  That is not a friendship.  That’s a lapsed friendship and should never be taken up again because of course there were reasons why we stopped talking.  Right?

Every once in a while I scan through my list and start deleting people for various reasons: never liked her, couldn’t care less about his life, would never in a million years invite them over for dinner.  Yes, I accepted their requests, or they accepted mine.  But I’m sure it was done for selfish reason (on my side it was, anyway).  The vouyer in me wanted to see what their lives were like.  How they had changed since highschool.  A little bit I wanted to judge (hey, I’m not proud of it, but there it is).

Only problem is, they can judge too.  They can see into my life just as I can see into theirs.  And as the days and weeks and months passed without any sort of comment between us it just got to be this creepy thing.  Looking at other people’s lives without having any intention of being part of them.

So delete delete delete.  Not all of them at once because, whoa, that’s just too much for one day.  But, slowly, I’ll get down to only the people I’m actually friends with.

This social networking makes me dizzy.  I finally sat down to study (really study) for the GRE a couple of days ago in a coffee shop.  Surrounded by my laptop and iPhone it was practiaclly impossible to get anything done.  I kept checking twitter and facebook and e-mail and blogs.  Anything to keep me from actually doing any studying.

What is life like for highschool students?  It was hard enough to get homework done with all the usual distractions, but throw in internet (not widely used when I was in highschool) and smart phones (which every teenager and tween seems to have) and seriously, how the hell does anyone have time to learn anything?

Wow, when did I turn into a crochety old lady?  I guess when I finally make it back to school I’ll have to learn to block it all out.  Or schedule breaks to delete the non-friends I have online.

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