Sleep Well

For the past several years Wes and I have had this small point of contention: the bed.

I’ll take a moment for all those jokes to be told inside your heads before continuing.

Ok.  Moving on.  The bed.  When we first started dating we both had full sized beds and somehow managed to make that work for over a year.  But that was early on so there was a lot of cuddling and staying close and generally not caring that there was another person in bed stealing our precious personal space.  Because the first year of a relationship is all about relinquishing your personal space, right?

We both upgraded to queen sized beds within that first year and were immediately flabbergasted that we ever spent one single night sharing a full bed.  There was so much room in the queen bed that it was strange.  We could barely find each other over all the new space we had.  “Wes, where are you?”  “Here. Just follow the sound of my voice.”

But, like all things, the shiny and new fades away rather quickly and pretty soon it was all elbows and knees and getting hit or kicked or pushed to the very edge of the bed.  Both of us were convinced that we weren’t the bed hog culprit; it was the other one, of course, and we would go back and forth: “You’re on my half of the bed and it’s too hot for you to be this close to me.”  It felt like we were on a family vacation and sharing the backseat with our sibling.  By the time we moved in with each other it was a constant refrain in our relationship: move over, you’re hogging the bed.  At one point Wes threatened to install a video camera to record us while we sleep, which I fully welcomed because I was (still am) sure that the problem wasn’t just one of us – it was both of us.  We take up a lot of space and move around.  And I sleep cold and he sleeps hot and sometimes you just need some space between you and your sleeping partner to, you know, get any sleep!

I kept telling Wes that what we needed was a king size bed.  Not in our tiny Orange County apartment, of course, but we absolutely needed a king size bed.  He would hem and haw and talk about how his sister and her husband got one and hated it because it was so huge.  Hated it so much, in fact, that they returned it for a queen (I know, crazy).  His mom scoffed at the idea of a king, citing the fact that she and her husband had been on a queen for their entire marriage.  And then two days later she looked at me and said, “I need to apologize to you.  We just bought a king size bed.”  And that is not even an exaggeration – they mocked me on a Thursday and bought a bed on a Saturday (or something like that – I don’t remember the exact days).

At some point in between all of this, Wes came around to the idea of a larger bed.  Perhaps it was the fact that we would be living in Hawaii, and if he thought I was hot to sleep with in Orange County in the middle of December, just wait for Hawaii in July.  And so when we found a house that had a guest bedroom, it was more or less settled that we would get a king bed.

And all that is to say that I’m writing this from our new King Size Bed.  Yes there’s an office with a fancy desk just steps away from me, but this bed is huge and so comfortable that I really don’t want to leave it for a very long time.

Special thanks to Wes’ parents who made this purchase possible as a wedding gift.  I think this means that I need to start working on my Thank You notes for all the wedding gifts that we might be receiving.

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Filed under Hawaii, Relationships are hard

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