New York: Part I-Was-Thisclose-to-Jon-Stewart

After basically having sex with Steve Buscemi on my birthday, I basically had sex with Jon Stewart the following day. Our friends Stephanie & Kenie were able to get us four tickets to the taping of The Daily Show Thursday afternoon and we pretty much spent all week counting down the days.

Wes and I went in ahead of Coop & Porter so that we could wander around Central Park. The place is huge and even though we spent hours making our way from one side to the other, we didn’t see even a quarter of it. So many places that we did manage to see I remember from movies and the more remote places I kept picturing the opening scenes of so many episodes of Law & Order and wondering how often people actually were murdered in the park (after Wes reads this he’s going to insist I stop watching so much crime drama).

I feel like this castle is from Stepmother but I’m not certain


This bridge is in pretty much any movie set in New York City

You may recognize this place from a little movie starring Mel Gibson before he went fucking crazy (Ransom)

Spoiler alert: Gary Sinise did not kidnap us

The movies have tricked me into believing that the chess area is always busy and that a grandmaster is always playing against a child prodigy. The movies lie.


We came out of the park at 5th Avenue because we thought it might be fun to see all the fancy stores. While we were passing everything, though, we remembered that we spent two years in Orange County and now we live on Oahu so we have pretty much seen the fanciest stores ever. While all the other tourists were snapping pictures of Tiffany’s or Louis Vuitton we were all Dude, seen it.

And then we started walking towards Jon Stewart because we weren’t sure how this whole thing worked and we really wanted to make sure we got our tickets and got good seats, but in the end it didn’t so much matter that we got there early because Coop’s busted ass knee got us in the second row. I was 20 feet from Jon Stewart, so I  basically had sex with him as well.

We expected to spend a couple of hours watching the filming of the show, but it actually only lasted about 30 minutes. There are no second takes – everything happens as fast as it does in the final cut. Which made the whole thing even more impressive if not a little sad that I only got to see Jon Stewart for maybe 45 minutes. Still, he’s every bit as charming and funny and smart as he appears to be on television.

Dude in the black shirt next to the yellow sign is Aasif Mandvi, who had just eaten half a stick of butter dipped in mayo

As you can tell from the above picture, we headed to a wine bar after the taping and relived all the moments we had spent watching the show. We were also accosted by a homeless man and because I, for whatever reason, don’t know how to just keep my head down, we shook his hand and he wouldn’t not leave us alone.

From the wine bar we headed to a whiskey bar my brother knew about.

Even though my brother was the only one in our group who cared for whiskey we all agreed to go. And I’m so glad I did. I had a manhattan (in Manhattan!)(my first) and it was so delicious. I was hooked and ready to try my brother’s Pendleton whiskey and it was delicious. I wondered why I had never enjoyed whiskey before and decided then that I would become the whiskey drinking type (spoiler alert: I haven’t had anything with whiskey in it since that night).

He’s jealous that I’m the cuter sibling

After the whiskey bar we headed back to Brooklyn to meet Steph & Kenie for a birthday dinner at Fornino where we had the most delicious polenta fries with Gorgonzola dipping sauce and I pretty much never want to eat anything but those again. But then the pizzas came out and they were even more delicious and now I pretty much never want to eat anything that hasn’t been made in their kitchen.

Dinner over, we made our way back (by cab – it’s so nice having a cripple in your group; you feel less lazy when you have to take a cab instead of just not wanting to walk 9 blocks back home) to Coop & Porter’s apartment. Porter was leaving the following day for a tournament in Minneapolis and still hadn’t packed. And honestly, Wes & I were exhausted from our constant goingness of travel.

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Filed under Family, Friends, Me, Travel

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